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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27505951">"Do You Know Who I Am?"</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/MyrJuhl/pseuds/MyrJuhl'>MyrJuhl</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Les Misérables - All Media Types</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Anxiety, Art, Awkwardness, Crushes, Dating, Disability, Domestic, Drama, Face Blindness/Prosopagnosia, Falling In Love, Feelings, Flirting, Hurt/Comfort, Kissing, Loss, Love, M/M, Medical, Memory Related, Modern Era, Protectiveness, Trauma, discomfort, physical health issues</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 02:21:46</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>7,130</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27505951</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/MyrJuhl/pseuds/MyrJuhl</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Suffering from a condition where he can’t recognise human faces, is the challenge Grantaire battles every day. Not recognising the bloke he's falling in love with on a daily basis is a curse.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Enjolras/Grantaire (Les Misérables)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>36</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>"Do You Know Who I Am?"</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>These events never happened. This fic is for entertainment purposes only, not profit. I, the author, make no claim through this work as to the fictitious characters/ actual lives/ preferences/ activities of the people mentioned herein.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>*</p><p> </p><p>It was a beautiful afternoon, when they first met. Grantaire was enjoying a cup of coffee at The Espresso Room close to Southampton Row; a walking distance to where he worked in Holborn.</p><p>“Is this taken?” someone asked pointing to the vacant seat at Grantaire’s table. </p><p>Grantaire’s attention was focused on the drawing he was working on, besides he assumed the bloke just wanted to take the chair to his own party, so he just said, “No. You can take it.”</p><p>“I don't want to literally remove it. May I join your table?” the stranger asked.</p><p>His first reaction was to look behind him, but the table there was vacant. “Suuure...” Grantaire dragged out his consent, uncertain as to why the bloke didn’t just pick an empty table instead of sitting at his. Only then did he look up from the drawing and almost stopped breathing. The bloke asking for his permission was probably the hottest thing he’d ever seen. “You want to sit here?” he asked.</p><p>“Yes,” the stranger said and smiled.</p><p>“Do I know you?” Grantaire asked to make sure, because... hot bloke... all right, and Grantaire were basically never in the same sentence, and hot guys never asked to join his table. It was perfectly understandable if he thought it could never become a variable.</p><p>Hesitating, the stranger put his hand on the back of the chair. “No? I’m pretty sure I’ve never seen you before,” he said and proceeded to sit down. “I would definitely have noticed,” he smiled again looking at Grantaire. “You’re not waiting for someone?” he continued, when he’d fished out a notebook from his bag.</p><p>“No, I wasn’t so, have at it!” Grantaire quickly said, suddenly flabbergasted to have company. He made his work area smaller to accommodate the man.</p><p>The newcomer got comfortable and studied his screen for a few moments before his attention was drawn by Grantaire’s doodles until he obviously couldn’t help himself and asked, “I’m sorry if it’s obtrusive but what are you drawing?”</p><p>Obliging gladly, Grantaire said, “Um... faces, people. I try to draw faces I imagine I remember.”</p><p>“Really? I see,” the bloke said sounding interested.</p><p>To get it over with right away, Grantaire elaborated, “I can’t recall faces, so I have a tendency to draw those around me.”</p><p>“I’ve read about that. So in a sense you’re like... face blind?”</p><p>“Huh,” Grantaire huffed amused, “That’s exactly what’s it’s called in Greek; face blindness.”</p><p>“Does it help drawing them?” his companion asked and kipped his pointy chin towards Grantaire’s sketchbook.</p><p>“Not really,” Grantaire said and shrugged. </p><p>“Couldn't you just take their photograph?” the bloke suggested logically.</p><p>Used to all kinds of friendly advice to ‘fix his problem’, Grantaire answered, “I tried but it only resolved in me needing to scroll through photos on my phone endlessly for people I don't recognise anyway.”</p><p>“Ah, what a drag...” the stranger said and then flashed another smile. “I’m David... even though I assume you’ll forget my face when we part,” he joked.</p><p>Grantaire laughed. “Yeah, sorry about that in advance. I’m Grantaire. It’s very nice to have met you.” <i>Fuck, how I wish I’d remember your face,</i> his pathetic inner romantic already pined.</p><p>“Likewise, Grantaire,” David said warmly. </p><p>They actually shook hands which lasted longer than necessary between two people who had just met. Grantaire wasn’t even in doubt that he was being hit on. It should have freaked him out, but instead he felt amazing and desired.</p><p>David was the first one to drop his hand and smoothly continued the conversation, “What are you having?” he asked and pointed to Grantaire’s cup.</p><p>“Huh? Oh, um. Just coffee black, but I’m just...” Grantaire began to say, but David ignored that and picked up Grantaire’s cup and went to buy fresh beverages. When he came back, he just put Grantaire’s cup where he’d picked it up and nodded. </p><p>“Cheers,” he said and took a careful sip of his own.</p><p>“I was actually going home soon,” Grantaire said sheepishly because he enjoyed David’s company tremendously.</p><p>“But I’ve only just met you,” David said and put his chin in his hand looking expectantly at Grantaire.</p><p>The poor artist gulped by the unfiltered attention he was receiving from him. “C-can I draw you?” he asked, deflecting the topic back at David.</p><p>“I suppose so. Why?” David said with mirth in his steel blue eyes.</p><p>“B-because I’d like to know that I’ve known you... you know... and mate, you’ve got... great... bone structure, like.”</p><p>“Thanks... I suppose,” David smiled. “But who says you can’t get to know more of me?”</p><p>“Um...” Grantaire said unintelligently; not expecting that since he was still stupidly flattered the man was actually interested in him of all people. Then he grinned. “Yeah, I guess no one said anything about that.”</p><p>“Where do you live?”</p><p><i>My fucking god. This is actually happening to me.</i> Feeling his face getting hot, Grantaire still managed to deliver the information. “You’re always this direct?”</p><p>“Of course. Why else would the term ‘short cut’ be invented. So where?”</p><p>“Uuum... Ravenscourt i-in Hammersmith.”</p><p>“Posh, huh?” David commented kind of passive aggressive.</p><p>“Yeah, but don’t get your knickers in a twist. I’m only a teacher. I bought the place because I inherited money. Otherwise I would never have afforded a home in that area code.”</p><p>“My knickers are just fine,” David smirked. “Still. Hammersmith? It is a nice neighbourhood.”</p><p>Grantaire chuckled loving the thrills he experienced; also, the guy knew about his condition but was still flirting outrageously with him. “It’s nice, yeah. So... Would you... would you like to um...”</p><p>“See your house? Be your muse?” David finished the sentence and closed the lid on his unused notebook. “Absolutely.” He stood up expectantly.</p><p>Hit by sudden premature performance anxiety, Grantaire ran his fingers through his messy curls but managed to get up as well. “Shit. Shit,” he muttered, “Well, all right. Let’s fucking do this.”</p><p>*</p><p>“How long have you lived here?” was the first thing David asked, when they entered Grantaire’s flat.</p><p>“About a year, I reckon,” Grantaire said and quickly looked around winching that, in spite of all the space an open loft flat provided him, the place was as messy as he’d hoped it wouldn’t be. </p><p>“What kind of teaching do you do?” David asked taking a tour to look at his music and film collection, book spines, artwork and art supplies. Everything.</p><p>“Well, surprisingly, I teach art classes at the University of Arts in Holborn,” Grantaire said, looking at David’s inspection. He was so gracious, and Grantaire wanted so badly to draw him in the nude. David kind of suggested it himself, didn’t he?</p><p>“How can you teach <i>and</i> grade with a condition like that?” David asked as he rounded the sofa arrangement, still looking keenly interested in everything.</p><p>“I grade my students’ artwork. Not by what they look like,” Grantaire said. It should be obvious, but as always, it was news to other people.</p><p>“Fair enough. I’m just intrigued,” David smiled and shrugged. He’d reached the tall windows by the sleeping nook facing the gardens across the street. “This must be incredible to wake up to,” he praised the view below. Turning, he watched Grantaire who coughed a little by the scrutiny. </p><p>Being deemed ‘intrigued’ honestly had a nice ring to it. He hung out at the kitchen island and watched as David eventually came over to join him.</p><p>“Holborn’s some distance from here,” David pointed out.</p><p>“Half an hour by tube? Not much, really,” Grantaire said. He was used to the commute. “What do <i>you</i> do?” he asked.</p><p>“I was going to become a doctor like my best mate, but apparently I wasn’t cut out for it. I was busier blaming the system about its faults instead.”</p><p>Grantaire laughed. “Oh... yeah. So what then?”</p><p>“I’m studying law now.”</p><p>“Of course,” Grantaire grinned until he saw David’s face. “Oh, you’re serious?”</p><p>“Deadly. It’s at the BBP University on Red Lion Street; so only a stone’s throw from where you teach.”</p><p>Grantaire bit his lip. What an incredible coincidence. David seemed to think the same thing because they shared a similar look in their eyes, visualising the possibilities.</p><p>“By becoming a lawyer...” David added slowly, “it’ll be a position where I can actually fight the system - otherwise there was only becoming an assassin or exotic dancer left.”</p><p>Standing still Grantaire absorbed David’s sinfully beautiful face. “...Or simply become a god,” he said wistfully.</p><p>“Are you gonna draw me like a god?” David teased and slipped his jumper over his head.</p><p>Mesmerised Grantaire gasped deeply and smiled. “You look fit, all right.”</p><p>“In your opinion probably,” David said indifferently and stepped closer.</p><p>“Oh. You know...” Grantaire chuckled. “I was supposed to draw you, right?”</p><p>David licked his lower lip and smiled. “I do think you meant my face.”</p><p>Grantaire nodded and grinned. “You’re right. I wanted to commemorate your face... and other things... so by the way, this place also has the most amazing windows in the roof. See? Perks of a penthouse London style.” He pointed towards his pride and joy and went to pick up a pencil and a large drawing pad.</p><p>“I do see. We should probably clear some of your stuff and I could stand right under it?”</p><p>“Yeah... Or <i>you</i> should. Work up a natural sweat, like... I can watch that... It’s incredibly inspiring,” Grantaire joked. However, David took it literally and actually began moving some of Grantaire’s stuff around, showing off his unfairly toned torso. </p><p>When he was done, he came over and got into Grantaire’s personal space again. “Are you turned on?” he asked, as he pulled down the zipper of his fitted trousers.</p><p>“God yes,” Grantaire gasped.</p><p>“So you wanna fuck?” David continued; lust dilated blue eyes focused on Grantaire’s lips.</p><p>“God yes, please,” Grantaire moaned; roof windows, drawing pad and pencils all forgotten.</p><p> </p><p>*</p><p> </p><p>And so they began the challenging task of dating each other. Usually, Grantaire had difficulty committing to relationships due to his disability, but with David everything was different. His boyfriend never acted exasperated towards him, and in spite of how busy David always seemed, he had endless patience around Grantaire and simply filled the artist’s life with joy. Every time David came over, Grantaire was astounded that this beautiful person standing outside his door was now his boyfriend. The shared happiness when David confirmed he was right was nauseously cute and Grantaire was over the moon with infatuation.</p><p>“How has it been for you all these years? Is it the same with your family, friends?” David asked one evening.</p><p>“Yeah, but I sort of not dwell upon faces to be honest, because it makes no difference. Scent, however, is sometimes my most important sense. And I know my family’s scent... knew... my parents are dead, hence why I was able to afford buying this flat.”</p><p>Like clockwork, David got the predictable look on his face that people usually did when they heard it, so Grantaire quickly diffused that. “I’m fine. It takes time, but I’m all right. Thanks for caring.”</p><p>Nodding, David didn’t say more and Grantaire continued his now well rehearsed version of his condition. “I wasn’t born with it. It’s something that happens in my brain and it’s too risky to fix it. I could lose my memory all together and I’d rather live with just face blindness.”</p><p>David speared a piece of cheese from a plate they shared. “Was it an accident?”</p><p>“Yes. I was...” Grantaire swallowed uncomfortable. “All right, I was beaten by bullies at school...” He noticed the tension in David’s shoulders immediately. “I don't really want to go into it. It’s in the past and dealt with accordingly.”</p><p>David’s shoulders slowly unclenched. “All right. Was ready for my first case there...”</p><p>Grantaire smiled. “Thanks. Really.”</p><p>Leaning in, David kissed him. “It would have been my pleasure. <i>Everything</i> about you... is my pleasure,” he murmured and nibbled at Grantaire’s lower lip.</p><p>From the amount of amazing sex they’d already had, Grantaire was quite aware of it and felt his face getting hot. “Fuck... I’m simply not used to people thinking that way about me.”</p><p>“Which is why I love saying it. I just want justice done.”</p><p>“And it has been.”</p><p>“I’ll try not to suffocate you with my need to do that. But... you know that I’m involved in an activist group from college, right?” David casually mentioned.</p><p>Knowing what David was going to say, Grantaire smiled encouragingly, “Yes. Finally, you’re going to ask if I want to meet them?”</p><p>“It’s a big deal. So, do you feel like coming along for a meeting sometime?” David asked imploringly.</p><p>“Yeah, all right,” Grantaire teased. “But, I’ll probably just annoy everyone because I won’t recognise them.”</p><p>“Not this bunch. They’re not judgmental. So will you?” David smiled with his eyebrows lifted expectantly, so how could Grantaire refuse him?</p><p>“Yes, I’ll come. But you’ll have to promise me you’ll be there, too.”</p><p>“I’m always there. Wouldn’t miss it for the world.”</p><p>“All right... I wouldn’t come if you weren’t there.”</p><p>“I know. But they’re good people. Don't worry. You’re very likeable.”</p><p> </p><p>*</p><p> </p><p>In the morning, when Grantaire woke up he could feel David next to him. Rolling over to share his warmth, he took a few moments to get reacquainted with his face. He knew his boyfriend was gorgeous but it still sent shivers through his nervous system rediscovering how much. </p><p><i>Wow...</i> As always, he was equally amazed that David wanted to be with him. It wasn’t healthy because David assured him the feeling was mutual and he would just have to accept that.</p><p>When David opened his eyes, Grantaire smiled stupidly. “Good morning handsome.”</p><p>“You know who I am?” David asked. He always asked for which Grantaire was eternally grateful.</p><p>“Yes. But then you never left, so I figured the chances of you being someone else, or me being that promiscuous on the same night in case you weren’t, were very slim. Besides - you smell like you.”</p><p>“All good points,” David said and leaned over to smother Grantaire into the mattress and take advantage, since they were already naked.</p><p>-</p><p>After David had left for school, Grantaire knew he had to get ready, too. Quickly, he grabbed a shower to get the smell of sex off his body.</p><p>When he was getting dressed he got a text from David. </p><p>
  <i>This is just a suggestion, but would you like for us to move in together? By that I mean your place?<br/>
- D</i>
</p><p>Grantaire didn’t even have to consider and dialled David’s number.</p><p>“Hey, you,” David’s voice said.</p><p>Eagerly he responded, “I know it’s soon but yes, I want you to move in with me.”</p><p>“I can’t tell you how happy that makes me, darling, but I’ve got to go. Can’t get a hard on in the middle of class,” David chuckled lowly and ended the call.</p><p>Grantaire sat back with his phone in his hands and a smile stretching his face. He knew he was falling even deeper in love with a man whose face he couldn’t even recall, but even just the sound of his voice was enough to make him very happy. He’d probably not been this happy since before his parents died.</p><p> </p><p>*</p><p> </p><p>The transition happened already the next day. David had stayed over during the night and, as they parted in the morning, Grantaire had given him a set of keys. Still it was a big surprise to come home in the afternoon and find that David had already moved in. His boyfriend had shared accommodations with his mate from med school. Now a girlfriend had been added to the picture and David wasn’t thriving in the cramped space any longer. David didn’t have many belongings to add to Grantaire’s home except unrealistically many documents, a ridiculous amount of books, a sturdy desk, an antique bookcase, and a dresser.</p><p>Making space for everything was clearly on the agenda for that evening and so they began the task.</p><p>“We live in a digital world. Why all this paper, David?” Grantaire wondered after shaking his head at the many boxes of notes and files.</p><p>“I know I should transfer my analogue journals to digital, but I just like the feel of paper in my hands,” David explained.</p><p>-</p><p>“I’m so done,” Grantaire said later, and fell down on his sofa. Making room for David’s stuff also included addressing his own clutter, and David turned out to be excellent in throwing out stuff Grantaire seemed to just not notice had accumulated.</p><p>“Yeah. Penthouses are a bitch, but they’re cool after you’ve moved in.”</p><p>“Oh, poor baby. There’s an elevator,” Grantaire grinned and made grabby hands at him. David came to join him and fell on top of him.</p><p>“My favourite view,” he said and kissed Grantaire’s nose.</p><p>“Ow, your phone digs into my groin,” Grantaire complained.</p><p>“Sorry,” David chuckled and pulled his phone out. “Wait. We’ve dated for weeks and still don't have any pictures of us.”</p><p>“All right,” Grantaire said and smiled happily. </p><p>David lifted the phone and took a selfie.</p><p>Checking the quality, David grinned. “We look silly. We’ll have to take a better one soon.”</p><p>“I wanna see it!” Grantaire laughed but was shut quiet by enthusiastic kisses.</p><p>“We should have a party. A housewarming?” David suggested.</p><p>“You sure? Who would even come?”</p><p>“My friends. Your... friends?” David inclined his head slightly. “You do have friends? You don't mention friends, but...”</p><p>Grantaire nodded. “A few. They come and go because... you know...”</p><p>“So no housewarming?”</p><p>“I’d rather not. I mean. There is that club of yours?”</p><p>“They’re my friends... they could be yours, too.”</p><p>“I’d like that. Mutual friends are just as great as separate friends.”</p><p>“Definitely... So we could mix our friends with... a housewarming party!” David joked and licked a stripe up Grantaire’s neck.</p><p>“Not fair. You know I’ll agree to anything when you promise naughty things.”</p><p>“And kiss you silly.”</p><p>“That, too...” Grantaire smiled and moaned lustfully.</p><p> </p><p>*</p><p> </p><p>“You do remember the address?”</p><p>“Yes. I will find it. My sense of direction is not broken, David.”</p><p>“Good. Just...”</p><p>“I know. Don’t worry. I’m a big boy,” Grantaire smiled and kissed him before he had to dash out of the door to get to work on time. David’s lesson was later in the morning. </p><p>During the day, he got a few encouraging texts from David, but eventually he stopped looking at them. They only made him unnecessarily nervous.</p><p>Finally, he got off from work and spent the remaining time to stroll around the area of The Musain. Honestly, he’d never heard of the place, but he was perfectly familiar with the address. The establishment itself ‘The Musain’, turned out to be the old ‘Corinth’ that now had new owners. That was why the address seemed so familiar. He used to come here occasionally when he was in college. </p><p>Looking at the windows, he saw many patrons inside, but nothing that looked like a meeting. He wished he could remember what David looked like and now his suggestion of a photo on his phone would have been handy. But the problem was he wouldn’t know if he was looking at David and he couldn’t be helped the tiny feeling of loss.</p><p>“All right. Just go in and ask where the meeting is taking place?” he psyched up himself and resolutely went inside.</p><p>The place was decorated much more stylish than back then. He liked the new décor. Zooming in on the bar, Grantaire went up there and smiled at the person tending.</p><p>“Excuse me, but do you happen to know where the meeting is held?” he asked.</p><p>“Hey, Grantaire. Long time no see!” the guy said, and Grantaire stood looking blankly at him.</p><p>“Help me out, if you know me,” he said.</p><p>“Sorry. I fucking forgot. It’s Bahorel!” the bloke said with an apologetic smile.</p><p>“Hey. Yeah, I remember now… you dated that Floréal Goth bird?”</p><p>“Mate, that’s years ago. And it wasn’t Floréal. It was Éponine.”</p><p>“Oh.... sure. I haven’t been here in years. Why haven’t you moved on?” Grantaire asked.</p><p>“Funny,” Bahorel laughed. “Because I happen to own this place now. Kind of motivates me to go to work.”</p><p>Grantaire laughed back. “Good for you.”</p><p>“You were asking for the meeting?” Bahorel finally answered his question.</p><p>“Yes,” Grantaire said and nodded.</p><p>“The l’ABC?” Bahorel asked.</p><p>“Yes, that’s the one,” Grantaire answered.</p><p>“Go through the curtain over there and you’ll find the people you’re looking for.”</p><p>“Thanks.”</p><p>“No worries. What do you want to drink?”</p><p>“Oh... do I have to order something to attend?” Grantaire asked already patting his pockets.</p><p>“No, no. It’s part of the meeting, mate. No alcohol though.”</p><p>“That’s... great. Um... Coffee black if you don’t mind.”</p><p>Bahorel looked like he smirked knowingly but wrote it down for the bill. Grantaire waited for him to make it before he headed for the curtain, excited to see David there.</p><p>Pushing the fabric aside enough to slip through, he stepped into the room. A handful of people were talking animatedly, discussing even, and Grantaire found himself a table in the back so he could observe the dynamic closer. David hadn’t arrived yet or he would have joined him, but people did send him curious glances. He waved awkwardly at some point.</p><p>A bespectacled man came over. He obviously wasn’t David or the spectacles were a new accessory.</p><p>“Hello and welcome. My name is Combeferre. You must be new.”</p><p>“Sure am. Name’s Grantaire.”</p><p>“Welcome. How do you know of us, if you don’t mind me asking?”</p><p>“Not at all, but David invited me. I’m waiting for him.”</p><p>“<i>David</i>, huh?” Combeferre cocked his head and looked around. “And he asked you to meet him here?”</p><p>“Yeah... He’s been a member of... this is the ABC, club, right?” Grantaire asked to be certain he hadn’t mistaken what the bartender told him.</p><p>“It is. We meet every Wednesday.”</p><p>“Then I’m at the right place. David wanted me to come.”</p><p>“You must be special. I’m glad,” Combeferre said and smiled again.</p><p>“Hey. I’m Courfeyrac,” a fresh faced brunette came over to join them. </p><p>“Grantaire, hi.”</p><p>Suddenly everyone decided to come over and introduce themselves and Grantaire was overwhelmed when the faces became bland again after they moved away. While he still remembered some of the names and characteristics, he pulled forth some drawing paper and began to draw their faces. Not all of them were a success because he got them confused. People had a tendency to move around so he lost track of whom he was drawing.</p><p>“Enjolras!” someone shouted when a gorgeous bloke entered the room. Like some supermodel, he immediately owned the floor as he steered directly over to greet the bunch of young men gathered.</p><p>“We have a newcomer,” Grantaire heard some people tell him pointing towards Grantaire’s table. Being singled out that way was embarrassing even if the men looked delighted while doing so.</p><p>Grantaire knew his boyfriend was unfairly good looking but he couldn’t be this striking. The Enjolras individual was clad in a vividly red jacket that could almost convince Grantaire he was thrown into a theatrical rendition of a revolution from the past. David only wore garments with Hugo Boss all over them, so Grantaire couldn’t even imagine his boyfriend dress in something so militantly inspired. But this bloke wore it like a political statement in itself, and Grantaire was certain if David wore something like he’d look even better than...</p><p>And just like that, Grantaire was blatantly checking him out. There was no harm done in that until he realised his eyes were focused on the man’s fitted trousers. They looked glued onto his thighs and Grantaire had to look away because his hands literally itched to feel how toned the muscles would be underneath the fabric. He knew how they would feel on David, but he couldn't just go up and start groping a perfect stranger intimately. In that moment the bloke looked directly at Grantaire and he had to gulp. The feeling of having that kind of intensity directed at him was enough to make him forget how to breathe. </p><p><i>Shit,</i> Grantaire didn’t know how to address the desire he was sensing. Knowing how good it felt to, and the awareness of <i>climbing</i> onto David’s naked lap, suddenly visualised before his third eye and didn’t help matters when he kind of wanted to do the same with this man right on the fucking floor. His confusion was palpably lurking its ugly paralysing head... but he bore all of it bravely and hoped his face was blank when the hottie in question reached his table, tailed by one of the others. Courfeyrac? Maybe?</p><p>With a blinding smile, Enjolras put his hands on the table and asked something that the noise in Grantaire’s head prevented him from catching.</p><p>Stupidly, he forgot everything he’d just felt and just nodded. Then he remembered how to speak and bluffed, “I’m fine. Everything’s fine.”</p><p>Enjolras smiled like he’d said the right thing. “You sure? You look... off.”</p><p>“Off?” <i>On. I’m so turned on.</i> “No. I’m fine. Honest,” he mirrored back the smile.</p><p>“I’m so glad and really, I hope you’ll enjoy the meeting since it is your first,” Enjolras said. His voice was warm, slightly high in pitch, which sounded a little different than David’s or maybe the chattering noise in the room made the man speak louder. The scent coming from Enjolras was faint, newly washed, but not conclusively David’s. Disappointed by these facts, Grantaire sat back with a hollow feeling that didn’t diminish as people settled down and David still hadn’t shown.</p><p>“Wow. Never seen you so...” Courfeyrac began to say, but Enjolras turned sharply on his heel.</p><p>“Don't!” was all he said and Courfeyrac immediately backed off and stepped to the side.</p><p>Unfortunately, that meant that Enjolras dialled the radiant smile down a bit. “Sure you’re all right?”</p><p>“Yes. I think I can handle a small meeting,” Grantaire said evasively, still returning that smile to try and prove it.</p><p>Enjolras didn’t look convinced but Grantaire was not an actor; this was the best he could do. Just like David could blow his synapses into pieces, this bloke was probably even in a stratosphere of his own, but Grantaire couldn’t really say that out loud. Fuck, where was David?</p><p>“You’re all right?” Enjolras still had time to ask him again. “Bahorel got you a free coffee?”</p><p>“Yeah. He… insisted.”</p><p>Grantaire didn’t know what else to tell this persuasive Enjolras character, so he just smiled vaguely and Enjolras left him alone; Grantaire could finally breathe normally again.</p><p>The meeting began and Enjolras was clearly the leader of the gathering. He spoke with conviction and dedication. The other members agreed wholeheartedly on all the topics on the agenda but Grantaire didn't really pay attention. The odd sensation hadn’t diminished, and though the feeling wasn’t new it was still uncomfortable.</p><p>After half an hour, he couldn’t stand it any longer and pulled out his phone to send David a text.</p><p>‘Where are you? Did something happen?’</p><p>There was no response, and Grantaire eventually couldn’t take it anymore. David had promised he’d be there and if he wasn’t present, then the meeting and Grantaire’s presence gave no sense either.</p><p>Suddenly a shadow fell over his table and looking up, he saw Enjolras towering over him again.</p><p>“Are you sure you’re all right?” he asked quietly. “You look... flushed.”</p><p>“No... I’m not all right,” Grantaire said and got on his feet. To his surprise the other people were also about to leave. The meeting was over so it was his cue to go home, any way. He gathered his things and moved towards the exit.</p><p>Stopping, he then turned abruptly. Enjolras was still next to him. </p><p>“What... what are you doing?” he asked.</p><p>“I did wonder if you’d like to hang out afterwards with the others, but I’ve decided to take you home instead. You don't look like you can manage on your own.”</p><p>“That’s quite presumptions of you and why do I know it’s you?” Grantaire asked cryptically.</p><p>“How do you mean?” Enjolras asked.</p><p>“I know who you are... I’m not supposed to know who you are.”</p><p>“Aha...” Enjolras said looking strangely at him. “Why not? Is it the clothes?”</p><p>“No. I’m not supposed to recognise your face!” Grantaire tried to say. “But I do!”</p><p>“All right...?” Enjolras said, clearly trying to humour him in spite of the spike of attentiveness in his eyes.</p><p>“I’m sorry. I must be very confusing to you.”</p><p>“No more than usual. What is your address?” Enjolras asked as if testing him.</p><p>“I know how to get home.”</p><p>“Congratulations. What. Is. Your. Address?” Enjolras repeated slightly aggressive.</p><p>“Fine.” Grantaire gave it to him, and Enjolras seemed appeased for the time being that Grantaire knew his own address. Apparently, Enjolras also knew how to conjure cabs because there was one waiting outside when they stepped out of The Musain. </p><p>The drive home was tense because Grantaire didn’t want to look at Enjolras who in return kept looking at him as if he would disappear if he didn’t. What was his problem? Did pretty people even have problems?</p><p>As soon as he got out of the cab Grantaire looked up, eager to see if the lights were on in the flat. They weren’t. “Fuck...” he said deeply worried.</p><p>“What is wrong?” Enjolras asked.</p><p>“My boyfriend is not home.”</p><p>Enjolras huffed as if it was the wrong answer. “Why don't we just get you home safely?” he said and followed Grantaire to the door. Grantaire tried to fumble with his keys, but adrenaline was a bitch and made his hands shake.</p><p>“Let me, all right?” Enjolras said, took the bundle from him, and locked them inside the building where after they took the elevator to the sixth floor.</p><p>“My boyfriend was supposed to join me at the meeting. He said he’s always at the meeting. Every Wednesday.”</p><p>“And who is your boyfriend?” Enjolras asked casually, unlocking the door.</p><p>Grantaire brain stopped for a few moments. “How did you know which key to pick?” he asked.</p><p>“That is the question, isn’t it?” Enjolras said and finally handed him back his keys.</p><p>Grantaire stepped close to him and inhaled deeply to catch his smell. The vague freshly showered scent he’d picked up earlier from Enjolras wasn’t there anymore. Grantaire stepped back again. “You don’t smell familiar.”</p><p>“Sorry. I showered at work.”</p><p>“Who does that?” Grantaire asked incredulous.</p><p>Enjolras sighed and pushed at the door to make it open wide. Putting a hand on Grantaire’s shoulder, he gently manoeuvred him forwards and closed the door shut after them. “Are you still feverish?” he asked, and put his cool hand on Grantaire’s forehead.</p><p>Annoyed Grantaire pushed his hand away. “I don't have a fever,” he said but he was feeling dazed and walked into the open living room space. The lights were turned on behind him as Enjolras flicked the switch.</p><p>Then he heard the water faucet being activated followed by the subtle noises of tins being opened ending in the smells of coffee brewing.</p><p>He sat down on the sofa staring straight ahead. The comfy monstrosity where he and David so often... Grabbing his phone, he hoped desperately for a response, but there was still none. Getting up he went to check the bed. It was untouched. Then he checked the office nook. Nothing was missing there either. Irrationally, he’d feared David had moved out without telling him he’d gotten fed up with him.</p><p>Turning he looked into the living room he’d vacated just now. Where was the bloke who followed him home? Enjolras.</p><p>Stepping back into the living room area he looked for him.</p><p>“Where are you?” he asked, almost afraid of his own voice. Was his imagination really on a roll tonight? In that moment he heard the toilet flushing and wildly he thought it would have to be David. </p><p>“David?” he asked hopefully, and went in the direction of the sound, but it wasn’t David. It was Enjolras.</p><p>“What?” he cried out. “Why do I remember YOU?” </p><p>Enjolras went to rest against the wall. “I don't know. What is wrong?”</p><p>“You’re not David,” Grantaire babbled.</p><p>“Come here,” Enjolras said quietly and reached out to him.</p><p>“I don't recall faces. Why do I remember yours?” Grantaire accused him. “What do you want from me?”</p><p>“Making sure you’re all right.”</p><p>“I’m freaking out, aren’t I?”</p><p>“Yes, you are. Badly.”</p><p>“Are you a medical student?”</p><p>“No. I’m a law student,” Enjolras answered clearly worried.</p><p>“Fuck... Where? Where do you study?”</p><p>“At the BBP University on Red Lion Street? You know this.”</p><p>“So you must know David?”</p><p>Enjolras shook his head slowly. “Please, take a deep breath, Grantaire.”</p><p>“I...” Grantaire said looking desperately at him.</p><p>“Deep breath for me. You can do it,” Enjolras said and took one himself to demonstrate how it was done, as he put his hands on Grantaire’s shoulder to ground him.</p><p>Taking a deep breath, Grantaire tried to imitate Enjolras and the minutes passed like that until he did feel better eventually.</p><p>“Let’s get you to bed, Grantaire,” Enjolras said softly. “You’ll feel better in the morning.”</p><p>Willingly, Grantaire went along, and like a child he even allowed Enjolras to undress him, put him in pyjamas and guide him to bed. He must have fallen asleep right away because he didn’t recall when the duvet was put around him.</p><p>*</p><p>In the morning, he woke up feeling his usual sharp headed self again. Then he turned his head fast as everything came back to him. Next to him, he saw someone asleep. His scent was calming immediately. <i>David.</i></p><p>“David?” he asked.</p><p>Slowly turning, his boyfriend greeted him with a sleepy smile.</p><p>“Hey. How are you feeling?” he asked.</p><p>“I’m fine now,” Grantaire said relieved.</p><p>“Do you know who I am?” came the usual question.</p><p>“You’re David,” Grantaire said.</p><p>“How can you tell?” David asked with a small frown of hesitation.</p><p>“Your voice. And you smell like you.”</p><p>“But you didn't recognise any of that at the meeting. I was fucking worried.”</p><p>“What do you mean?” Grantaire asked. “You.... weren’t there?”</p><p>“You don't remember? You were pretty worked up. I don’t think it’s a good idea to bring you next time. You kind of scared me when you didn’t believe I was me.”</p><p>“You were there?” Grantaire asked. “Did I get amnesia or...”</p><p>“Sweetheart. I brought you home last night. Don't you remember?”</p><p>“But that was... that other bloke...”</p><p>“Enjolras?” David asked and quirked a brow.</p><p>“Yeah. The strange thing was I remembered him all the time. His face. It didn't vanish.”</p><p>David sucked in his lips and took a deep breath. “But you don't remember this face?”</p><p>“No...” Realising what he’d just said sent a horrifying feeling through him. “Gods, I’m so sorry. It feels like I’m cheating on you with this...” <i>Enjolras</i></p><p>His image flashed before Grantaire’s inner eye and confused he looked back at David. Now, the images were so similar it was hard for him to distinguish. “Why did you ignore me the entire evening?”</p><p>“I sat right next to you after my speech.”</p><p>Grantaire just stared. His brain simply wouldn’t agree with him. “I don’t believe you. I looked at... Enjolras... the whole time.”</p><p>With a small sigh, David reached over and grabbed his phone.</p><p>“Courfeyrac sent me these pictures.” Scrolling down he handed over the phone and Grantaire took it. Staring at the pictures he sagged. Right there, the both of them sat. David... or rather Enjolras was looking at him with a protective expression on his face on most of the pictures. And Grantaire himself... well, he looked more and more panicked.</p><p>“I think your brain couldn't handle reacquainting me all evening under those circumstances.”</p><p>“I’m teaching a class full of strangers every day. Why should this be any different?” Grantaire objected.</p><p>“I don’t know. Perhaps Combeferre has an answer.”</p><p>“The bespectacled bloke?”</p><p>“Yes.”</p><p>“The one you know from med school?”</p><p>“Yes,” David said beseechingly.</p><p>“Is he an expert on this subject?”</p><p>David looked away and scratched his chin. “No... but... he is intrigued by this and might specialise in psychiatry anyway.”</p><p>“It’s not mental. It’s physical,” Grantaire reminded him.</p><p>“With the way you’re reacting, are you sure it’s not also mental?” David asked.</p><p>“Don't do this to me. Don't be that guy who thinks he can pull a diagnose from his sleeve and magically cure me after all these years.”</p><p>“All right,” David said and slipped out of bed. When he came around to Grantaire, he reached out his hand and grudgingly, Grantaire grabbed it. </p><p>David looked lovingly at him. “I care about you more than you can imagine. So the way you reacted last night scared the shit out of me.”</p><p>Grantaire whimpered. “I’m sorry.”</p><p>“I'm sorry, too,” David said and put his arms around him.</p><p>Grantaire reached up and touched David’s golden curls. “Were you really there?”</p><p>“Did you black out perhaps?” David asked holding him tighter.</p><p>“Did it look like it?”</p><p>“Maybe. You were drawing furiously the whole time and it didn't make any sense.”</p><p>“I was drawing, yes. Did you bring my sketchbook?” he asked suddenly worried where it had gone. </p><p>“Yes, of course. You didn’t lose it,” David said as he let go and went to fetch his bag. Rummaging through it he found it right away. Grantaire joined him and took the book from him. </p><p>The pages from last night were his usual doodles, but yes. They made no sense.</p><p>“Whatever is inside your head could be messing with you; perhaps you should consider a check-up.”</p><p>Grantaire looked at him. David’s face was still merging with what he recalled of Enjolras’. It was difficult accepting they were the same person and it was in fact seriously fucking with him.</p><p>“I have check-ups every six months... but I’ll schedule one if it makes you feel better.”</p><p>“The fact that I’m becoming a lawyer, doesn’t mean that my medical interest has diminished, so yes - it would make me feel better,” David said.</p><p>A few moments of silence passed between them before he offered, “I could go with you...”</p><p>Grantaire hesitated but then obliged. “Yeah. I’d like that.”</p><p> </p><p>*</p><p> </p><p>“Is this seat taken?”</p><p>Looking up from the assignments he was busy grading, Grantaire had to squint at the person addressing him. He’d just come from his doctor’s appointment. David was supposed to come with him, but had to cancel. He’d gotten his internship out of the blue today and they were going to celebrate it later.</p><p>The bloke leaning against the back of the opposite chair was ridiculously hot, but Grantaire was taken and he believed firmly in monogamy. Relaxed he responded, “No. All yours.”</p><p>“Thank you,” was the bloke’s response as he sat down and slowly pushed a beverage across the table towards Grantaire.</p><p>Protesting, Grantaire reacted promptly, “I didn’t order that.”</p><p>“’fraid so. The barista said you’d forgotten it.”</p><p>Scanning the table, Grantaire realised that he was right. He had ordered something but forgotten to bring it with him. “Thanks... that was kind of you, but shouldn’t he have realised that sooner?”</p><p>“Yes, he should, and carrying it over here was my pleasure,” the bloke said.</p><p>Grantaire looked at him sharply. “Do I know you?” he asked.</p><p>The bloke smiled back lovingly. “I’m pretty sure you know you do. So any news?”</p><p>“Nope. All my levels were normal... gods you smell divine,” Grantaire had to point out with a knowing smile, and when he leaned over the table for a kiss, David met him halfway.</p><p>“You’ve started getting a kick out if this, haven’t you?” David asked, when the kiss was finished.</p><p>“Maybe...”</p><p>David moved his chair closer to Grantaire’s and sat down.</p><p>“What did you order?”</p><p>“Irish coffee.”</p><p>“Are we already celebrating, then?”</p><p>David sighed. “There are so many things to celebrate today, isn’t there?”</p><p>“Mostly yours, though. I already knew my results would be negative,” Grantaire said. “Where is your internship located?” </p><p>The barista came over and put two saucers with cakes on.</p><p>“Oooh, strawberry cake,” Grantaire gushed and smiled widely at David. “And almond tart for the gentleman...”</p><p>“Our favourites,” David said and looked positively beaming at the thought.</p><p>Looking at him, and recognising the small characteristics that made him David, swelled in his heart, and suddenly Grantaire confessed, “I love you... fuck...” </p><p>David almost froze for several moments. “Thank you,” he finally said.</p><p>Grantaire chuckled uncomfortable. “You’re supposed to...” David cut him off with a hard kiss.</p><p>“Your confession belongs to you. Feelings are not something couples can negotiate about.”</p><p>“Wow. That doesn’t really help...”</p><p>“Grantaire... I was probably going to propose to you soon...”</p><p><i>Oh, my goddamn fucking god!</i> Grantaire’s inner fan girl screeched. “So you do love me back?”</p><p>“Yes, I love you back... I mean. I love...”</p><p>“Wait. Propose?”</p><p>“Not right now at this moment... but yeah. Eventually.”</p><p>Grantaire laughed nevertheless and looked at David with stars in his eyes.</p><p>The barista came over and smirked, “Congrats... that’s actually phenomenal.”</p><p>“Thank you, Bahorel,” Grantaire said. “Just because your little coffee hut has become my favourite doesn’t mean you can eavesdrop at your convenience.”</p><p>“You know who I am?” Bahorel asked surprised.</p><p>Looking up, Grantaire didn’t recognise the bloke at all, but he knew his voice pretty well by now. “Yes. I know who you are. Just... not what you look like.”</p><p>“Rather...” Bahorel said, “Invite me to the wedding. I’m your best mate.”</p><p>Looking back at David, Grantaire said, “No, you’re not, and I’m not gullible just because I can’t recognise your face.”</p><p>Reaching over, David touched Grantaire’s cheek and if the art teacher didn’t have other things to do right now, he’d spend hours just drowning in his eyes. Feeling this sappy felt amazingly good. </p><p>“Grantaire, I want you to draw me after we’ve had sex tonight,” David said sultrily.</p><p>“Gees, Enjolras! Really?!” Bahorel cried out in outrage and quickly left them.</p><p>David laughed heartily and Grantaire bit his lower lip.</p><p>“I fucking will, and then I’ll post it on l’ABC’s website.”</p><p>David’s smile vanished and it was Grantaire’s turn to burst into laughter.</p><p>“You’d never...” David said testily, but Grantaire just wiggled his eyebrows.</p><p>“Probably not... 60%...”</p><p>David narrowed his eyes and then shrugged. “Whatever.”</p><p>“You’d actually let me do it? Will you wear that red jacket?”</p><p>“Absolutely. I’d let you post a drawing of you balls deep in my arse, and I’d still propose to you.”</p><p>Grantaire cocked his head. “That’s the most beautiful thing anybody has ever said to me.”</p><p>“Wanna get out of here?” David asked, pushing his chair back.</p><p>“Gods please,” Grantaire moaned and grabbed his almost-fiancé’s hand.</p><p> </p><p>End of Tale 11. November 2020</p>
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